My wife and I are approaching our fifth anniversary this summer, and I have to say it’s been a wild ride. Ups and downs, fights and good times, and three adorable (if hyperactive) children that keep my wife and I from coming to an understanding of the fullness our what our relationship could have been.
What I’m saying is that I can’t do it anymore. It’s not working. Nobody is happy. The oppressive bonds of my cradle Catholicism, which keeps me from exploring my individuality and truly claiming my sense of self. I’m not free to use modern medicine to plan when I want to have children or not, explore creative, loving relationships with other women, or miss Mass on Sundays without feeling that I’ll be cast into hell for all eternity.
Surely, no loving God would demand such restrictions on happiness. I’ve come to understand that the God I’ve professed a belief in is nothing more than a medieval construct. I can’t continue pretending that I want to be a part of something that I don’t. The charade can only go on for so long.
I’ve found a nice Zen Buddhist monastery in upstate New York, not far from where I grew up. I know that peace and serenity of the Catskill mountains combined with a holistic, non judgemental theology will do a world of good for my troubled soul. Perhaps it can heal some of the wounds that I’ve long suffered from never feeling free to really be who I am. I’ve decided to quit my job, and I’ll be heading up to the Zen Mountain Monastery at the beginning of May. I’ve made some provisions for Jamie and the kids. It will be hard, but we all think it will be best.
I don’t think they let you blog from the monastery, so this space will probably be closing down soon. If I ever have the opportunity, I’ll make sure to get it started again.
I apologize that this announcement comes so abruptly and unexpectedly. Thanks to all of you who have been reading and supporting me for so long. Your continued prayers will be appreciated, as I’m sure that God (whoever she is) will hear them and find a way to apply them as blessings in my life.
you got me hook line and sinker!
Now I am aware of what today is………………………………
I didn’t have the heart not to tag it so people wouldn’t spend the day wondering…there was a time when I would have really committed.
I was laughing out loud through the entire post. The repeated use of liberal cliche was priceless.
I was a bit disappointed in how you tagged it. I was so looking forward to the bleeding-hearts pleas for reconsideration.
You didn’t fool me for a minute! I’ve seen pics of your family and beautiful wife - no way!
Mary
Riiiiiiight.
Nah, Steve … you gotta do the April Fool’s thing all the way or not do it at all. And no, my hating A MAN FOR ALL SEASONS is not a joke.
You had me … until the beginning of the second paragraph. Ha. You’re flighty, alright, but not that flighty.
You had me going until the end of the first sentence of the second paragraph.
I know you well enough now to know you’d never use a phrase like “my sense of self”
Well, inspired by your announcement today, I’ve decided that I’m finally going to allow myself to eat gefilte fish.