Warming Trend: U.S. Ice Cubes Melting At Alarming Rate!
Sounds like bad news for the future of my habit-forming dirty martinis:
High summer temperatures and ever-increasing levels of U.S. beverage consumption are causing ice cubes across the nation to melt at “an alarmingly unprecedented rate,” the U.S. Department of Consumer Affairs reported Tuesday.
“We are looking at a nationwide trend of crisis proportions,” said Clyde Simms, director of the USDCA’s potables division and Clinton-appointed Beverage Czar. “If the current rate of melting continues, we may face a situation in which Americans are not assured the option of having an ice-cold beverage in their hands at any given moment.”
Of the 28.9 billion tons of ice cubes produced commercially in August, it is estimated that less than half remains. With these frozen resources already depleted—most of them having been removed from proper storage facilities and left to melt in glasses, paper cups and styrofoam coolers—government officials are powerless to stem the tide.
“So far, we have been able to replenish our ice-cube reserves at a fast enough rate to maintain an acceptable level of comfort,” Simms said. “But how long will this melting continue? How long can we keep up?”
[snip]
In the wake of Tuesday’s announcement, supermarket, convenience-mart and liquor-store owners across the U.S. are anxiously monitoring their ice chests, hoping they will have enough bags of cubes and blocks to meet demand.
Enlarge Image U.S. Ice Cubes Melting At Alarming Rate
U.S. Ice Cubes Melting At Alarming Rate
“Where are the 18,000 pounds of ice we made just last month?” asked Brian Ketterling of Chicago’s Central Refrigeration, which produces ice 24 hours a day. “I’ll tell you where: nowhere. Even the puddles are gone.”
“People say ice cubes are a renewable resource,” Ketterling continued, “but try telling that to anyone facing a freezer full of empty trays when it’s time to make a 7&7. The last thing on their minds is renewability; they need ice cubes, and they need them now.”
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This is truly a bigger concern to me than global warming. Making new ice cubes is annoying!
If the ice cubes melt, my drink will overflow?
Yes, Joe, and then cute, fuzzy mammals will die. You should know the drill by now.